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FF: Unfazed
*needs a Nathan Scott icon*
Despite my many gripes with season 3, I'm still watching One Tree Hill. I saw Who Will Survive, And What Will Be Left Of Them yesterday, and ficlet happened.
When he was eight years old, Nathan Scott saw his first soccer game, ever. His uncle Keith took him to watch the other kids in the park. Basketball was all he ever talked about at home, and while his father was proud, it got to the point where his (over-protective) mother began to worry. It turned out to be the most fun he had that month, and to date, Nathan wasn't sure whether to chalk it up to the novelty of the game or to spending time with his fun uncle Keith whom he didn't get to see all that much.
When he was twelve years old, Nathan Scott saw his first NBA game, in Charlotte. Nathan was a rebellious boy, rapidly growing tired of all the plans and dreams his father had set out for him. At first, he challenged his dad's decisions - which made him yell - and once, his mom caught him almost running from home. In the end, he was growing bitter at anything and everything basketball. His uncle Keith surprised him with tickets for the Hornets Vs. Dallas Mavericks on his birthday, and Nathan couldn't surpress the beam that lit up his baby face. His dad was away on business, he never would have to know. On the drive home, Nathan told his uncle he wanted to be David Wesley when he'd grow up. Keith ruffled his hair and laughed, then said, "You will be anything you want, Nate."
When he was sixteen years old, Nathan Scott made a stupid bet with his bastard half-brother. He knew it was stupid, and he thought Keith wouldn't approve, but he was sure that he knew enough of Lucas. He cringed at just the thought of being team mates. And his dad was proud of him, while, Nathan knew, Keith would most likely side with his other nephew.
When Dan cut him off, Nathan felt ashamed. Not because his dad was disowning him, but because he had been so blind for all that time. His uncle Keith gave him a job and no questions. For the first time in his life, Nathan Scott felt like he could stand on his own. Not that he wanted to; he had Haley with him, now.
When his mother went away, somehow Nathan told himself he shouldn't have been surprised. It wasn't the first time, and Nathan clung to the belief this wouldn't be the last. At least now she was clean, and she was free. Sometimes, when he remembered, Nathan prayed that he wasn't wrong about that. Sometimes, he prayed that he would see her again soon or late, and the rest of the time he spent kicking away the doubts, telling himself he didn't care.
Then his uncle Keith came back to town, and Nathan felt a pang of envy towards his brother, but mostly, it made him smile. Sometimes, Nathan Scott wishes his own father would just die already, and he's been through enough to know he means it. But when he's away from him and closer to every one else, it's the anger, the contempt he holds in his heart that seems to die down a little more each time. As Nathan Scott edges closer to himself, he'd like to think maybe it's not all poison in his veins.
Only now was Nathan beginning to feel entitled to that kind of hope. Only now did he start to let the feeling in, maybe his life hadn't always been and wouldn't always have to be so bad. There was a side of his family that had yet to let him down, and now he was beginning to see it. An uncle, a wife, a brother. Only now was Nathan Scott beginning to feel entitled to that kind of trust.
And Haley's alive, he loves her, he's so grateful for her. Keith is gone, and Nathan wishes so hard he'd acknowledged their bond earlier; but it's too late, now, and his brother's all broken-up, so Nathan will take it in stride. He'll mourn his uncle quietly, and thank God for Haley, and be strong for Lucas, and will only let the darkness overwhelm him when he's alone. People will say the whole thing left him unfazed; Nathan Scott will be crying inside.
FIN
*siiiiiigh*
I'll miss Keith. *heartbreak*
Despite my many gripes with season 3, I'm still watching One Tree Hill. I saw Who Will Survive, And What Will Be Left Of Them yesterday, and ficlet happened.
When he was eight years old, Nathan Scott saw his first soccer game, ever. His uncle Keith took him to watch the other kids in the park. Basketball was all he ever talked about at home, and while his father was proud, it got to the point where his (over-protective) mother began to worry. It turned out to be the most fun he had that month, and to date, Nathan wasn't sure whether to chalk it up to the novelty of the game or to spending time with his fun uncle Keith whom he didn't get to see all that much.
When he was twelve years old, Nathan Scott saw his first NBA game, in Charlotte. Nathan was a rebellious boy, rapidly growing tired of all the plans and dreams his father had set out for him. At first, he challenged his dad's decisions - which made him yell - and once, his mom caught him almost running from home. In the end, he was growing bitter at anything and everything basketball. His uncle Keith surprised him with tickets for the Hornets Vs. Dallas Mavericks on his birthday, and Nathan couldn't surpress the beam that lit up his baby face. His dad was away on business, he never would have to know. On the drive home, Nathan told his uncle he wanted to be David Wesley when he'd grow up. Keith ruffled his hair and laughed, then said, "You will be anything you want, Nate."
When he was sixteen years old, Nathan Scott made a stupid bet with his bastard half-brother. He knew it was stupid, and he thought Keith wouldn't approve, but he was sure that he knew enough of Lucas. He cringed at just the thought of being team mates. And his dad was proud of him, while, Nathan knew, Keith would most likely side with his other nephew.
When Dan cut him off, Nathan felt ashamed. Not because his dad was disowning him, but because he had been so blind for all that time. His uncle Keith gave him a job and no questions. For the first time in his life, Nathan Scott felt like he could stand on his own. Not that he wanted to; he had Haley with him, now.
When his mother went away, somehow Nathan told himself he shouldn't have been surprised. It wasn't the first time, and Nathan clung to the belief this wouldn't be the last. At least now she was clean, and she was free. Sometimes, when he remembered, Nathan prayed that he wasn't wrong about that. Sometimes, he prayed that he would see her again soon or late, and the rest of the time he spent kicking away the doubts, telling himself he didn't care.
Then his uncle Keith came back to town, and Nathan felt a pang of envy towards his brother, but mostly, it made him smile. Sometimes, Nathan Scott wishes his own father would just die already, and he's been through enough to know he means it. But when he's away from him and closer to every one else, it's the anger, the contempt he holds in his heart that seems to die down a little more each time. As Nathan Scott edges closer to himself, he'd like to think maybe it's not all poison in his veins.
Only now was Nathan beginning to feel entitled to that kind of hope. Only now did he start to let the feeling in, maybe his life hadn't always been and wouldn't always have to be so bad. There was a side of his family that had yet to let him down, and now he was beginning to see it. An uncle, a wife, a brother. Only now was Nathan Scott beginning to feel entitled to that kind of trust.
And Haley's alive, he loves her, he's so grateful for her. Keith is gone, and Nathan wishes so hard he'd acknowledged their bond earlier; but it's too late, now, and his brother's all broken-up, so Nathan will take it in stride. He'll mourn his uncle quietly, and thank God for Haley, and be strong for Lucas, and will only let the darkness overwhelm him when he's alone. People will say the whole thing left him unfazed; Nathan Scott will be crying inside.
FIN
*siiiiiigh*
I'll miss Keith. *heartbreak*